Have You?

Is Your Self Esteem Too Low Are You Afraid To Disagree You May Be Co-Dependent Co Dependency is common in families with addiction and substance abuse. There are many degrees of codependency. The severity of the condition is variable since the intensity of symptoms vary instead of being on an all or nothing scale. Also important to note: Not everyone experiencing the symptoms below suffers from codependency. These 20 questions may be result from other family dysfunction, but still signal that you may need help to start feeling better.

1. Do you keep quiet to avoid arguments?
2. Are you always worried about others’ opinions of you?
3. Have you ever lived with someone with an alcohol or drug problem?
4. Have you ever lived with someone who hits or belittles you?
5. Are the opinions of others more important than your own?
6. Do you have difficulty adjusting to changes at work or home?
7. Do you feel rejected when significant others spend time with friends?
8. Do you doubt your ability to be who you want to be?
9. Are you uncomfortable expressing your true feelings to others?
10. Have you ever felt inadequate?
11. Do you feel like a “bad person” when you make a mistake?
12. Do you have difficulty taking compliments or gifts?
13. Do you feel humiliation when your child or spouse makes a mistake?
14. Do you think people in your life would go downhill without your constant efforts?
15. Do you frequently wish someone could help you get things done?
16. Do you have difficulty talking to people in authority, such as the police or your boss?
17. Are you confused about who you are or where you are going with your life?
18. Do you have trouble saying “no” when asked for help?
19. Do you have trouble asking for help?
20. Do you have so many things going at once that you can’t do justice to any of them?

If you identify with several of these symptoms; are dissatisfied with yourself or your relationships; you should consider seeking professional help. Arrange for a diagnostic evaluation with a licensed physician or psychologist experienced in treating co-dependency.

Check out Al-Anon.org to learn about co dependency in families with addictions

Martyr

In your own day
People listened,
When you stood and spoke,
We offered hearts and minds
Questioned you and your ways,
Yet you always prevailed,
Bearing the spirit of support
A burden that became
A flaming torch
As you crossed the line.

I kneel to pray
I hold you in my thoughts
Image of an artist
With the taste of vision.

You burned more candles
Than the night could bear,
Lifted rags up and filled them
With men and women.
You gave us voice for song
When we could only squeek,
Clap hands and chortle
In our delight.

When you left us, we had
Acres of desolate sand,
Dry trees an wilderness,
Waiting for a spark.

Now rains deluge us
Beyond reason.

We drown in your absence.